“If I’m paying for it, I’m going to order it the way I want it.” This advice actually came from aforementioned guy. He was a schmuck about it, but he wasn’t totally off-base. In simplest form, yes, I do now order my food the way I want it. I’m sure I’m the bane of fine chefs everywhere. But the deeper message is this: Ask for what you want. And I don’t mean in a pushy, make-the-other-person-feel-guilty sort of way. Sometimes you have to respect that it’s not appropriate or even kind to ask for what you want, but generally, there is no harm in just putting a wish out there in the universe. To continue the metaphor, it’s silly to eat a meal gagging on the mustard when it’s just as easy for them to leave it off.

“Never rely on a man to make you happy.” Ironically, this came from the aforementioned guy’s mother. While we were dating. Was that a sign? Most certainly. But the deeper message is this: You are responsible for your own happiness. More importantly: You are responsible for your own life and life choices. And perhaps, most importantly: No one else is responsible for you, making you happy, or making your dreams come true.

“Stop waiting around like some fairytale princess and get on with [your] life.” This gem comes from a book called The Tao of Inner Peace by Diane Dreher. As dramatic as it may sound, this book literally changed my life. I’m still feeling the impact of her interpretation of the Tao Te Ching to this day. Coincidentally, this also could refer to my relationship with a certain guy – and at one time it did – but now it has other connotations. It’s a more active version of the previous quote. The deeper meaning: Not only do you need to take responsibility for your life and your actions, you need to claim that responsibility and act on it. If you aren’t happy with something, change it. If you want something, go after it. And if someone stands in your way (or simply ignores you), go around them.

People occasionally ask me how/why I’m such a confident person. The truth is that I’m probably not as confident as I seem. But, 1) I believe that I am just as good as (if not occasionally better than) anyone else and, 2) I follow the above advice wholeheartedly. The result is that I’m not particularly tied to other people’s opinions of me and I don’t rely on other people’s approval to feel good about myself. I’m not going to bore you with how I got where I am, but I’ve just tried to turn adversity into strength.

Over the past 6 months to a year, I’ve been complaining a lot about a few things happening in the mom blog arena. I decided that it was time to quit complaining and create the blogging life I want for myself. I’ve got a few projects in the works that I’m excited about and it has been inspiring to throw all of my energy into positive things. I have no intention of being the blogging version of the fairytale princess.

This post is for my daughter, really. LadyBug, if there is one thing I want to pass on you, it is the strength to stand, confidently, on your own two feet.

Related posts:

1. Life Lessons from BlogHer
2. Princess Dreams
3. Giving Thanks

Take The Cake

© Gamewright

The favorite game of the  bunch was well-timed for LadyBug’s 3rd birthday, although she is still a bit too young to fully understand the rules. Take the Cake is a counting and shape matching game wrapped into a fun concept. You roll the die and get a 1, 2, or 3. That tells you how many times you can shake the cupcake. With each shake (hopefully) some decorative “sprinkles” fall out. Match the sprinkles to the shapes on the game cards and if you finish any of the sets, the card is yours. The cupcake shaker is a bit tricky, since kids are inclined to keep shaking rather than stop after only one or two tries. And I wish they had designed the cards so the spots for the pieces were cutout so little hands couldn’t easily knock pieces off, but otherwise this game is a gem. It’s a simple concept and the elements are all appealing to young kids. Who doesn’t love the idea of “decorating” a cupcake with colorful sprinkles?

Take the Cake is designed for 2-4 players ages 4 and up, requires no reading and has (not surprisingly) won quite a few toy awards.

Rory’s Story Cubes

© Gamewright

Rory’s Story Cubes are one of those games that are so simple that there is plenty of room to play your own way. This tiny little set comes with 9 dice, each with 6 different images. Roll the dice and tell a story using the images you uncover. You can tell the story out loud, have everyone write their own version from the same dice, or act something out with no words at all. The small size of this game and the lack of a game board make it ideal for throwing in a purse or backpack, playing on a plane or in a campground and giving as an add-on gift or a stocking stuffer. I just love the options for Rory’s Story Cubes and think it’s a great option for families, classrooms and even nursing homes.

Rory’s Story Cubes are designed for ages 8+ (although younger kids can have fun, too) and can be played alone or with an unlimited number of players. It’s another multi-award winning game.

Can You See What I See? Bingo Link

© Gamewright

What happens when you take Bingo, cross it with an I Spy-style game and then add a dash of strategy? You get Can You See What I See? Bingo Link. And, at the risk of sounding like a broken record, it’s a great game!

Each player chooses one of the four game boards. The player who goes first, chooses one of the pictures on the board and calls it out. Everyone places a marker on the corresponding picture, Bingo-style. And then the next person goes. The goal is to create a path from one side of the board to the opposite side (they are color coded) while keeping other players from doing the same. The first person to make a path wins.

Bug and I have played this a number of times and he is starting to get the strategy involved in choosing spots (you can’t just pick all the pictures you like most if you want to win!). LadyBug is still too young for this one. She will play for awhile before she starts hoarding all of the pieces so she can cover the entire board. It is probably not surprising, but you can’t cover one entire board and still have enough to play on two other boards! Anyway, this one is fun, relatively quick and accessible to a wide age range. Older kids will employ a bit more strategy to block each other from winning, while younger kids can focus on making their own way across. If you’ve got really little ones, it’s just good for them to find identify and locate pictures on the board. I think this would be a nice choice for kids with special needs as well, as it forces them to work on a pincer grip and choose a picture out of a sea of options.

Can You See What I See is designed for 2-4 players (wish there were a few more game boards!) ages 6 and up. There is no reading required and it also has won a fair share of awards.

Sounds Like a Plan

© Gamewright

I only selected one game geared toward older kids and adults and this was it. The premise is similar to Apples to Apples, which is a popular choice at family gatherings. Each player has several “Advice” cards in their hand at any given time. One by one, players take turns being the “judge.” That person turns over a “To-Do” card that has three possible activities. The judge chooses one of those activities and each of the other player has to submit an Advice card based on categories such as Best Advice, Worst Advice, Advice from Your Grandmother and Advice from a Kid. The judge ranks the cards from favorite to least and players are awarded points based on how their advice went over.

This game is fun and funny, but the rules definitely felt a bit too complicated after playing similar games.  The feedback was mixed on the die that mandates what type of advice to provide, as some of the fun is deliberately providing an absurd answer that you know the judge will appreciate. Players felt more pressure to choose the “correct” bit of advice based on the die, rather than the answers they enjoyed the most. Scoring and moving around the game board with 6+ players also felt unwieldy. General consensus was that we liked the premise of the game, but might simplify it by dropping the die and game board and just choosing one favorite card each round (thereby awarding just one point).

Sounds Like a Plan is designed for 4-8 players ages 10 and up, but could certainly accommodate more with slightly altered game play. It has the longest game time of the Gamewright games review (logical, since it’s aimed at an old crowd) at 30 minutes. Once again, this could easily be shortened or lengthened with some slight game alterations. It is also an award-winning game title.

Gamewright Games

If you browse the Gamewright website, you’ll find some general themes. While not true of every title, these apply to most of their titles:

• Minimal commercial tie-in
• A lot of card, die and other small package games
• Price points that make these nice add-on gifts
• Intelligent game play, not just the luck of the draw
• Room for alteration of the rules to meet the needs of the players, or for creating new games entirely

Overall, I’m a big fan of this brand. There are no batteries required and nothing blinks or sings. It’s a refreshing way to spend some quality together as a family.

Disclosure: There was no promise of a positive review and the opinions in this post are my own. The Amazon affiliate links contained in this post have no bearing on my product reviews.

Related posts:

1. Casual Games and a Pictureka! Museum Mayhem Review
2. Pogo, Poppit and a BlogHer Sponsorship
3. Looking For a Video Game Reviewer/Tech Writer

You may also not know that Cold Stone Creamery works closely with the Make-a-Wish Foundation. This year, on September 30th, you can join “The World’s Largest Ice Cream Social.” Make a donation and receive a sample of “Kate’s Creation” (caramel apple ice cream mixed with apple pie filling, chocolate shavings and graham cracker pie crust), designed by 11 year-old wish recipient, Kate, from Tampa Florida. It will be a yummy way to support a good cause.

In the meantime, I’m giving out FIVE $10 gift cards to Cold Stone Creamery. That’s plenty to buy a treat for you and a friend, or if you’re feeling extra generous, some pre-packed ice cream to share with the whole family.

PLEASE TAKE A MOMENT TO READ THE TWO RULES. IF YOU’RE CONFUSED, JUST ASK!

The Prize: $10 Gift Card to Cold Stone Creamery (5 prizes)

To Enter (once per person/household):

1. Leave a comment on THIS post (right down below) telling me your dream ice cream flavor, either a pre-existing flavor or one of your own creation.
2. Make sure you enter the correct email address in the email spot on the comment form so I can reach you. Please DON’T put your email in the actual comment.

Details:

• Contest will end at 11:59pm Eastern on September 3, 2010. (Date extended due to a typo! Sorry about that!)
• U.S. addresses only (sorry, international friends!)
• Adults (18+) only
• Winners will be chosen via random.org. Winner must comply with all rules mentioned here, or a new winner will be selected. I will have the final decision in this matter.
• I will email the winner who will then have 48 hours to respond and claim their prize.

Bonus Entries:

• Subscribe to this blog via email/RSS (once)
• Blog about this contest using the full url *no shortened links* (once)
• Tweet about this contest (max 1 per day)
• Fan/Like Quirky Fusion on Facebook (once)

To claim bonus entries, please post one comment on this post per bonus entry (include permalink or tweet url).

Questions? Contact me.

Disclosure:  There was no promise of a positive review and the opinions contained in this post are mine.

No related posts.

My Goals

Fabulous CheeseBurgHer Gals

I believe that in order to get what you want out of a conference, you have to know what it is you want to get. It’s just one of my many BlogHer life lessons. My goal this time was relatively simple. I was all about relationship building, both with brands and other bloggers. Any decisions I made about private events, sessions and other activities were a reflection of that goal. I was either preserving a relationship, or forging a new one. I shied away from some of the larger events (with the exception of official BlogHer parties) and tried to focus on more intimate activities.

Sessions

I only attended one session this year and it was Grief, Loss, Tragedy and Community on the Internet. It’s somewhat ironic that this is the session I chose to attend because I sometimes think that there is a lot of rubbernecking going on in the blogosophere. Not that we don’t care, but that we feel compelled to take on everyone else’s tragedy and make it our own. Someone at the session commented that it had been such a difficult year with so many children lost, but I think the truth is that we are drawn to those types of stories and so they seem to magnify in our minds. I found myself doing that and made a commitment that I would not flock in support of people I had no relationship with simply because they were dealing with a crisis.  I was getting a skewed perspective on things. I mean, if you read every story about a sick child, you’re bound to start feeling like there are an unusual number of sick children out there. And there are certainly too many, but not any more really than there were last year.

So why did I attend? Anissa, of course. It’s not that I wanted to hear her speak. I simply wanted to send my good vibes her way in person. But in the end, it was good for me to hear the stories from the other women on the panel. Because it solidified something in my mind (it wasn’t intended to be their takeaway I’m sure), which is that there are bloggers who blog for breadth (breadth of stuff, brands, followers) and those who blog for depth (self-expression, strong relationships with others, a message). And I loved being in a room full of people who are all about the depth. I’ll blog about that at another time because it was a powerful moment for me.

Events

I wrote a post before BlogHer about the myth of private parties and I have to mention that before I go on.  I strongly believe that you can have a fantastic time at BlogHer without attending a single private event. In fact, I missed a few things at BlogHer that I wanted to see because I was gallivanting about. But it came down to meeting my goals and I was pretty firm about making decisions based on that.

Ellis Island with Liberty Mutual/Responsibility Project - I already blogged about what they did right, so go check out that post.

Child’s Play PR/Bloganthropy Dinner On Us – This was a lovely event. While there were  plenty of brands present and I chatted with quite a few of them, the highlight for me was in hearing about all of the fabulous work the Bloganthropy Award nominees were doing. I also got a little makeover from e.l.f. Cold Stone Creamery was there as well and I’ll be doing some yummy giveaways from them.

Nikon Night Out – This was a hot event on so many levels. First of all, people were clamoring for invites. It was one of THE talked about parties at BlogHer ’09 (for better or worse) and

Hot, Hot, Hot at the Nikon Party

folks wanted an invite. Second, it was about a million degrees up there on the roof of the Bryant Park Grill. Third, they had a bunch of hunky firefighters roaming around handing out pins and schmoozing with the ladies. My feelings were mixed on this as a brand event. I had fun, although I would have had more fun if I hadn’t literally been melting. But I actually wanted to connect a bit with Nikon, maybe get some tips on using my camera and some time to play with a Nikon camera. Sure, there were cameras there that we could borrow and take photos with, but I was a bit too intimidated by the spread to try them out. Would I attend again? Yes. And did I appreciate not having a lecture on the brand? Double yes. But still, I was hoping for something… more. Plus, Ashton wasn’t there, and he just should have been. Social media maven and all that.

Getting Gorgeous – Audrey and Vera really went all out on this event. There were clothes, makeovers, some tech/gadgets and a ton of swag. My favorite is my Powermat (oh, and I’ll be giving one of those away shortly, so you can enjoy as well!) which charges devices without tons of cords. Yeah, I’m biased. I’d much rather get a gadget than a manicure! Chris Mann was there wandering around and he kindly chatted with me for a few minutes before another blogger came and launched herself into his arms.

MomSelect Swag Suite – The MomSelect Swag Suite was definitely a step up from last year where they had technical difficulties (broken freight elevator) and space challenges (a tiny suite to navigate through). This year they had still run out of some items before I arrived mid-day on the first day, but most of the tables were staffed by company representatives. I appreciated being able to talk a bit with the companies and learn more about the products, but also that those tables were handing out samples so the early birds couldn’t just stuff their bags.  My fave item? The HEXBUG Nano. A weird little mini-robot that looks (and behaves) like a bug. I’m hoping to do a giveaway with them, but they don’t know that yet…

From Left to Write Book Club Meetup – This was one of the highlights of the conference for me, although it really had little connection to BlogHer at all. We had a small meetup in a bar in a local hotel and had the opportunity to chat with a “mystery” writer. Our writer turned out to be Karen Bergreen, author of Following Polly. She’s a lawyer turned stand-up comedienne turned author. The meetup was mellow, fun and full of fantastic women. It was just what I needed that night.

Sweets in the City – Hosted by Complicated Mama and co-sponsored by The Big Toy Book and Sharpie, this was a smaller suite similar to the official BlogHer brand suites. It was a bit crowded when I arrived, but they had a decorate-your-own wine glass section (which I passed on because I didn’t want to try to bring it home) and some yummy cupcakes. My favorite part was honestly the Sharpies. Someone could just stick me in a room with multi-colored Sharpies and some things to color and I’d be in heaven.

Glamour and Games – A swanky little party with e.l.f. and Kinect Xbox 360. I arrived a bit late and found the scene completely overwhelming and crowded. And, yes, I’m the geek who asked all the ladies to move out of the way so I could play video games. I’m not a big makeup fan, so I was really there to play with Kinect!

Loews Hotel Brunch – Hosted by NYCityMama, Loews and Fisher-Price, this was the perfect way to end my weekend. The brunch was low-key and delicious. They talked a bit about Loews Hotels, but gave us plenty of time to chat with each other and connect. I’m hoping to learn a bit more about the Loews brand because I was impressed by the event overall. They also sent us home with “Make Whoopie” goodie bags which amused me… we’re on a whoopie pie kick at home, so it was fun to get a whoopie pie and a recipe and some cute “Make Whoopie” gear.

People

A Raving Rabbid - Yeah, Don't Ask

People are the lifeblood of BlogHer, so I simply can’t do it justice in just this short (or not) post. I’m not going to lie, 2400 people is a LOT of folks. It was overwhelming. But I was more prepared this year – I had an idea of what to expect and I knew a lot more people. There is something comforting, even in a sea of people, to know that the odds are that you know someone else in the room.

Just a few of the people I met, hung out with, or were impacted by. It’s not everyone, so please don’t take it personally if you’re not on this list. There were a few people I just kept running into. Those are on the BlogHer 10 peeps list.

@missbanshee – We didn’t talk much, but we bonded over our trouble remembering names and faces! And we ran into each other all over the place.

@kellyology – Kelly and I connected on the Ellis Island tour (there’s a pic of us together on that post). She’s definitely on of my BlogHer 10 peeps.

The gals from 360PR – They might have been following me, but I can’t be sure. That’s ok. I still love them.

@musingsfromme – My roommate who is the NICEST person, but who never sleeps. It’s was still fun having someone rehash events of the day with.

@c2cmom – Heidi is my girl, so of course she’s on my list.  But we also coordinated our event schedules for the most part so we could party hop together. It’s a nice way to ensure you’ve got people you know but, since we’re both grown-ups, we were attached at the hip either.

All my lovely Boston blogging family and my extended NYC blogging family.

@whymommy – The beautiful Susan who (hopefully) forgives me for being so distracted during the Loews brunch and for being confident enough in herself to be patient with me. I was desperately tired at that point, but still delighted to chat with her in person.

@mommyfactor – Nikki was willing to join me as I played around with Kinect for Xbox 360, so I wasn’t even that upset when she won the Xbox system instead of me!

@mommybytes – Ok, Angela is technically one my Boston blogging gang, but since she party-hopped with me on Saturday night, she gets a shout-out all on her own. Not only that, but she’s a good enough friend to bring me a swag bag of adult items (ahem) and to drive me home post-BlogHer.

As I mentioned above, if I were to list out everyone I had the pleasure of spending time with at BlogHer, this post would never end (and I’d most definitely forget some folks).

The Bad

Honestly, I had two bad moments at BlogHer and I’m not even going to waste the time to talk about them.

The Swagly

While I don’t go to BlogHer for the swag, I know people get curious about what sort of things are given out. Although some people might disagree, I actually went a bit light on the swag this year. Sure, I still had maybe 4 or 5 bags of stuff, but I turned down several more bags. I accepted gift bags at events I attended, but turned down almost everything in the Expo Hall. The only things I picked up there were small items for the kids (Play-Doh, figurines, etc.), and a blinking ring from Macaroni Kid. Oh, and a sponge. For some reason, t-shirts were big this year. I think I came home with 4 or 5 of those. Some other faves (not mentioned above):

• A Play-Doh kit with several different colors and an extruder. My kids love Play-Doh.
• A 4GB memory card from Nikon (which has been promised to my mom).
• Cookies from Cheryl & Co. from Liberty Mutual. Mmm. Those are gone already.
• A toy from super-fabulous Sprig Toys – totally recycled, safe and battery free – woot!
• Bubble Talk – a board game I’ve been wanting to try out.
• A gorgeous necklace from lia sophia. The picture doesn’t do it justice.

I also got quite a few water bottles/travel coffee mugs to add to my collection. They’re now competing for space with all of my flash drives!

Related posts:

1. The Danger of Too Much Swag: A BlogHer Tale of Caution
2. BlogHer and the Terrible, Horrible, No-Good, Very-Bad Day
3. BlogHer and the Private Party Myth

Group shot at Ellis Island. Photo courtesy of Ketchum

Heading to a conference in a different city always feels exciting, but in reality, I often don’t have the time/energy to go out and explore. So, when I first heard that BlogHer 10 would take place in New York City, I was thrilled (it’s a home-away-from-home for me), but realistic. I wasn’t going to expect very much tourist time. In stepped Liberty Mutual with a pre-conference blogger tour of Ellis Island and my conference experience was complete.

Liberty Mutual invited a few dozen bloggers on a private tour and lunch at Ellis Island to talk about their Responsibility Project and give us a chance to connect with their brand. And paired up with Ketchum, they did things just right. The day started at 11am, giving me plenty of time to get a rare sleep-in and start my conference experience fully rested. We met outside the hotel to board our bus to Battery Park.

During the bus ride, we were given gift bags with fun goodies like cookies and an autographed copy of The Ellis Island Immigrant Cookbook, which was written by our fabulous tour guide, Tom Bernardin. But the bags were practictal as well, holding a couple of bottles of bottled water and sunscreen. It was a thoughtful way to kick us off for a hot summer’s day of sightseeing.

The team from Ketchum and Liberty Mutual welcomed us and said a few words before showing us a video about the Responsibilty Project and how it all got started. And then they turned things over to Tom, who talked about the history of the city and Battery Park, the different neighborhoods in downtown Manhattan and some facts about the Statue of Liberty and Ellis Island.

We arrived at Battery Park and walked past the long ticket line, and the even longer security line. We got VIP treatment! We then boarded the ferry for the hot, but beautiful ride to the Statue of Liberty and then Ellis Island. I have been there before, but it was just as inspirational to ride by the Statue and pull up on the shores of Ellis Island. My great-grandmother, great-grandfather and two great-uncles passed through Ellis Island from Russia and I kept them in my mind as we toured the grounds.

Tom led us through the museum to a private, air-conditioned room for lunch. We had a few more remarks from the Liberty Mutual team, as well as Peg Zitko, the VP of Public Affairs at The Statue of Liberty-Ellis Island Foundation. We were then treated to another Reponsibility Project video directed by and starring Danny Glover. You can watch Second Line on the Responsibility Project website. And then they gave away some cute jars of old-fashioned candy to one person at each table. I won ours!

After lunch, Tom took us on a quick, but informative tour around the Ellis Island museum and the grounds, before heading back to Battery Park. On the bus ride back, he shared a bit more info before we dropped him off near his home in the Village.

The Liberty Mutual/Responsibility Project Ellis Island tour was one of the big highlights of my BlogHer weekend. The ability to spend time with so many other amazing women, get in some sightseeing and reconnect with my own ancestry was priceless. But in terms of brand connection, the team did a fantastic job. We got the message they were trying to convey, but we also felt like we were given a special gift as well. I hope other brands and PR firms take note… there are ways to work with with bloggers where you get what you need, while still respecting us as individuals. Trapping us in a room while you parade your entire team in front of us in presentation after presentation isn’t engaging, isn’t fun and isn’t the best use of your time.

In addition to hosting this tour, Liberty Mutual hosted a Responsibility Project booth in the expo hall where they hosted a number of round table discussions on personal responsibility. You can read also the transcripts from those discussions on the Responsibility Project website.

Related posts:

1. BlogHer 10 Recap – The Good, the Bad and the Swagly
2. Grocery Delivery – A Tour and Review of Peapod
3. Bad Parenting Moment 1028 – First Field Trip

• Even though we’re adults, most of us are still afraid we won’t be accepted
• Being afraid to join a group isn’t the same as being excluded by that group
• Knowing your goals for a conference is the first step toward meeting them
• Some people just need to complain
• We’re all just people. No need to be star struck or intimidated.
• It truly doesn’t matter what you wear, as long as you feel comfortable in it.
• Exhaustion doesn’t equal snobbery.
• Worrying about what other people think is a barrier to happiness.
• Your conference experience will largely be what you choose to make of it. Choose wisely.
• Pregnant gals can still dance a heckuva lot better than I can.
• Hugging pretty much everyone you meet is a surefire way to have a feel-good weekend.
• Sitting with just the people you know keeps you from meeting new people.
• Keeping an open mind is the best way to find new opportunities.
• Don’t put people on pedastals. They’re bound to fall off.
• I am not the only one who is awful with names and faces.
• Some strange law is in effect so that you will repeatedly run into the same people over and over and entirely miss others for the whole weekend.
• Taking the up elevator may be the only way to ensure a ride on the down elevator. (No, this is not a metaphor)
• Brand events may be fun, but they are never as rockin’ as the official BlogHer parties.
• Cupcakes are oh-so-trendy.

And I want to reiterate this… If you meet someone you admire and they seem stand-offish, cut them some slack. It could be that they are shy, tired, overwhelmed or otherwise distracted. In many cases there is a reverse correlation between the popularity of a blogger online and their comfort with massive groups of people offline.

Me w/Kelly from @kellyology/kellykincaid.com - A BlogHer who I hadn't much spoken to before, but who was EVERYWHERE I went during BlogHer10!

Related posts:

1. BlogHer and the Private Party Myth
2. BlogHer 09: Looking Back
3. Party With Me at BlogHer ’09! (and try Word Whomp, too)

There are so many themes in The Stuff That Never Happened that struck a chord with me, but none more than the plight of the main character’s daughter, Sophie. Part way into her first pregnancy, she goes into a bathroom stall and sees blood everywhere. She panics, assuming that she’s losing the baby. And, although this does not happen to the main character, it is a catalyst for everything that follows.

I was only 6 or 7 weeks pregnant with Bug when I came home from work to find that I was bleeding heavily. I was devastated. Although I wasn’t very far along, I was excited to be pregnant and already beginning to anticipate the type of mother I would be. There was so much blood that I was certain that I had already miscarried. I called my husband and then my OB/GYN in tears. I was sure that the ultrasound they scheduled immediately was a routine measure to prove that I was no longer pregnant.

[You can read the full post on More than Mommy]

Related posts:

1. Parenting the Introverted Way
2. Michael Buble Invites Crazy Love
3. Creative Play Wins Out!

What I like about Pop On Pals overall is that they are a great option for free and creative play. The people aren’t tied to any commercial characters and the interchangeable rings allow them to create the type of scene they’d like. All of the toys in the line seem to be bright and colorful and open to exploration and imagination. There is a lot of potential here. But there is one drawback to the entire line that I simply can’t overlook. Extra Pop On Pals (this set comes with just one) are available in 2-in-1 sets. Each set has a Pal, plus rings/hats to create two separate identities. Cute, right? Except that the boy Pals can be a Handy Man/Fireman (ahem, Firefighter), Baseball Player/Policeman (once again, Police Officer) or Farmer/Doctor. The girls can be a Pet Doctor/Gardener, Ballerina/Musician or Princess/Chef.  Really? Why not pair up the Ballerina with the Baseball Player or Firefighter? The Princess with the Police Officer? Sure, you can mix and match them, but you have to buy enough sets to do that. I don’t want to buy an extra set just so my daughter (and son) can have less gender bias in their lives.

And I have just one real complaint about the Amusement Park Deluxe Playset. Despite the claim on the box that it promotes “social play,” it only comes with one Pop On Pal. I expect a starter set to come with one character, but when I buy a $34.99 “deluxe” set, I expect two. I mean, who wants to go to a carnival alone anyway?

Despite my complaints, this playset was an engaging activity for both of my kids, but certainly more so for my 3-year-old. It’s the type of toy that I can see being used regularly over time, although probably not in ways the manufacturer envisioned. It comes with a roller coaster car which can double as a regular car, making it all that much more open to interpretation from my kids. I hope Spin Master (the manufacturer) will rethink the 2-in-1 sets in the future. In the meantime, our one Pop On Pal will have to play by himself.

Pros:

• Several areas of play
• Plenty of moving parts
• No commercial tie-in
• Pop On Pals are a nice size for little hands

Cons:

• Only comes with one Pop On Pal
• Music can be a bit annoying

Disclosure: I received the Pop On Pals Amusement Park Deluxe Playset as part of my relationship with with Team Mom and ChildsPlayPR. There was no promise of a positive review and the opinions in this post are my own.

Related posts:

1. A Cricket Tale and an Adventurous Review
2. Casual Games and a Pictureka! Museum Mayhem Review
3. Blissdom: PR and Marketing 101 – Review Blogging Templates and Prompts

Myth #1 – I’m not cool enough. Brand parties/events at BlogHer are a chance for brands to connect with bloggers in the demographic that interests them. They are typically smaller gatherings, often a dinner or a special activity. And if it seems mysterious as to who gets the invite, it is. Each brand has their own goals. Some might be looking to strengthen relationships with bloggers who are already fans. Some might want a chance to sway those who prefer a different brand, are on the fence or are indifferent. Perhaps they want families with young kids, political bloggers, bloggers with huge followings, bloggers who write about crafts, those who write particularly well, those who do product reviews. There is no one right answer. If you didn’t get an invite, it’s not a reflection on you as a person. Take another look at your blog to make sure you’re presenting an image that will draw the brand relationships that interest you and read my tips below.

Myth #2 – I won’t have fun if I don’t get private party invites. Nothing could be further from the truth. There is SO much going on at BlogHer, that you’ll have a hard time not keeping busy. There will always be people around doing something, even if it’s just hanging out in the lobby and playing games. Sure, it may feel like you’re missing out on something great when you see a bunch of bloggers heading out together to a party, but that’s all part of our natural inclination to want to be included. Some brand events really aren’t that much fun, anyway.

Myth #3 – I’ll miss my chance to connect with brands. BlogHer is crawling with brand reps. You can’t spit without hitting one (I don’t recommend the spitting part). You’ll find them easily accessible in the Expo Hall. You’ll find them in quieter spaces in the brand lounges. And you’ll probably find them by taking time to meet new people in sessions, at meals and in the hallways.

Myth #4 – I’m going to miss the swag! Hah. Check out my blog post on the danger of too much swag. I went to two private parties last year (one I coordinated and one I co-hosted), but the bulk (and, in fact, the most valuable) of the swag came from official BlogHer parties and the Expo Hall.

Myth #5 – Private parties are “better.” Some are, some aren’t. It all depends on what you’re hoping to get out of your experience and what the brands are hoping to get out of it. I met some fantastic people are the official BlogHer parties, including a few who opened important doors for me later in the year. Relationship-building happens throughout BlogHer and you never know who you’ll meet who will 1) become a great friend and 2) become a great contact. If you only focus on brand events, you could miss your chance to connect with a diverse group of amazing folks. Not only that, but official parties tend to have no agenda other than to have fun!

So, if you’re still hoping for private party invites in the future, I’ve got a few tips to help the process along. The basic idea is to present yourself as a professional with value to offer brands.

1. Keep doing what you’re doing, and do it well. Write well, write often, but don’t just focus on the “stuff.” If you look at the people getting the bulk of the invites, you’ll find bloggers with strong voices, and a persona beyond that of Review Queen.

2. Network all year long. There are plenty of review groups out there and opportunities to connect with brands. If you want brands to reach out to you, you have to make it clear on your site that you’re open to their advances. And remember, every person you connect with is a potential resource. Sure, a PR person may be reaching out with a product that doesn’t match your needs, but they may be representing something that does a few months down the line. Don’t burn bridges.

3. Don’t beg and plead for invites. Not only does it seem desperate, but it puts the event planners in a difficult spot. Would you do that with a wedding or birthday party? Hopefully not, because it’s incredibly rude. Typically, they have enough space for a certain number of people and you can assume that they invited enough people to fill those spots. Begging to be included means that they have to be the “bad guy” and turn you down. No one enjoys that. If there is a brand that you are particularly interested in working with and you feel like you can really bring something to their campaign (note: it’s not all about you!), you might consider a note to say that you’re available at that time for last-minute cancellations. And let them know that you’d be interested in working with them in the future. There is no pressure for them to respond and you’ve politely and professionally expressed an interest in the brand. That will leave you in a positive light for future opportunities.

4. Don’t badmouth PR reps and brands publicly. If you attend a brand event and do nothing but complain, other brands will notice. Remember, things you say and do in public reflect on your own personal brand.

4. Participate in the community. Join groups, comment on other blogs and be present on Twitter. The best way to get your name out there is to have meaningful engagement with other bloggers and brands.

5. Be patient. I’m always shocked that bloggers who have been around for 6-12 months expect that they’ll get all the best event invites. There are thousands of us and some of us have been doing this for a really long time. Sometimes, you just have to pay your dues…

Related posts:

1. Party With Me at BlogHer ’09! (and try Word Whomp, too)
2. BlogHer 10 Recap – The Good, the Bad and the Swagly
3. Birthday Party Dilemma

I went into the movie not quite knowing what to expect. The Kids Are All Right stars Julianne Moore, Annette Bening, Mark Ruffalo, Mia Wasikowska and Josh Hutcherson. It tells the story of Nic and Jules, a lesbian couple, and their fabulously normal and angsty family.  As their daughter turns 18, she and her brother set out to meet their biological father, an anonymous sperm donor. From that point on, we start to see the holes in their perfect family, the difficulty of keeping a marriage together, and the joys and heartache parents experience as their children grow toward independence.

I don’t think I was quite prepared for this movie which was so raw and honest. Family is complicated. Family is love, humor, anger, frustration, patience, discomfort, joy, triumph, despair. And it all came out on the screen in moments that had the audience laughing, as well as moments that were almost too uncomfortable to watch. And when things go downhill, it can’t be resolved with an easy Hollywood ending. Instead, much like in real life, we’re left with a family that’s hurting, but still banded together.

The Kids Are All Right is like peering in your neighbor’s window and, without their knowledge, watching all of the ups and downs in their life. I thought it was a fantastic film and extremely well acted. My only complaint was that one of the characters manages to hurt her family with seemingly little hesitation or guilt. Given the bonds that were shown on screen, I thought that she might have been more conflicted.

This isn’t a movie for the ultra conservative among us, but if you want to see something real, while still being entertained, The Kids Are All Right is a good bet.

Related posts:

1. Celebrate National Mom’s Nite Out with Me!
2. Mom Bloggers and PR Peeps – Don’t Waste My Time
3. Mom Bloggers, Money and Professionalism